“We think we listen, but very rarely do we listen with real understanding, true empathy. Yet listening, of this very special kind, is one of the most potent forces for change that I know.”
Carl Rogers
How is it already February? I am now finished with my interviews and the submission portal for our program lists opened to us today. Over the past month, I’ve been working in our pediatric nephrology clinic, which has been a blast. Getting to work with attending physicians who are invested in teaching and encourage you to ask questions always makes for such a great experience. I learned plenty about medicine, but also about life. The heart to hearts I had this month with my mentors about making my residency rank list and succeeding as a future resident were just what I needed moving toward Match Day. I’m so relieved to have completed my interviews, though I’m glad to have rotations to keep me occupied between now and when I find out where I will be spending the next 4 years.
As I get ready to start residency, it’s been fun honing my skills counseling patients. At our children’s hospital, nephrology typically manages patients’ blood pressures, so talking about forming healthy diet and exercise habits was common. Helping patients set goals and find ways to incorporate healthy foods and activities they enjoy was really rewarding. I also made it a point to check in with patients about how life was going beyond their health concerns. So many families’ routines have been thrown entirely out of whack by the pandemic that lots of kids have been struggling, especially with virtual school. Acknowledging what everyone’s sacrificed and taking time to truly hear people out goes a long way. Many times, people just need an outlet to vent, especially children. They’re trying to process all the changes going on around them and are acutely aware of all the pain and uncertainty in the world. So many kids are missing their friends. Those who already felt isolated are now missing the sports team or music group that was one of the few places they felt they belonged. Kids who rely on schools for food are worrying about where their next meal will come from. Not to mention, home isn’t the safest place for everyone. Some children suffer from abuse or live in unsafe neighborhoods. It’s important to take the time and acknowledge these factors so you can meet your patients where they are.
Patients with chronic medical needs also have been dealing with reduced access to therapies and resources, as well as appointments that had to be cancelled or moved around due to COVID restrictions. Last month I was reminded how, particularly for children with complex medical needs, parents are often the experts about their child. Kids don’t always read the textbook and their parents know them best, so they frequently pick up on subtle changes we may not. As patients grow older, they will become their own biggest advocates, so it’s important to ensure they have the tools to do so and that we take the time to listen to them. Whether it’s a young patient saying “I don’t want blood work”, or your thoughtful college-aged patient providing insight about things to expect as younger patients get older, the power of getting the patient’s perspective can’t be overstated. I had the greatest time talking to one patient who was receiving dialysis, and won’t soon forget her thoughts about what she wished we would know as future doctors.
I’m looking forward to spending the next month in our genetics clinic as I count down the days until Match Day! I’m excited for the next adventure, but definitely not looking forward to the “see ya laters” that will soon follow. If there’s one bright side, it’s that we are way better at technology now so it will hopefully be easier to keep in touch with everyone.
The Music of Medicine 